Writers With Mental Illness

Dissociative Identity Disorder: Host And Alters

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Have you ever woken up to a natural disaster? Tornado sirens, an earthquake, rising flood waters? That is what it’s like for me, an alter, to “wake up” and suddenly have control of our body. While I am generally aware of what’s going on, my presence tends to be limited to a “passive influence,” helping…

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Why Finding Happiness Was Easier (And Harder) Than I Thought

finding happiness

Not too long ago, I had doubts. Doubts about who I was, what I did in this world, why I was here and if others would love me for being myself, just because… I got so frustrated thinking that I was doing things wrong, convinced that there was something I needed to improve. There had to be something I needed to change for…

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How My Mental Illness Fuels Me To Help Others

I’ve been suffering from depression for as long as I can remember. I wasn’t truly diagnosed until I was nineteen and in college (where I could get free counseling). But I knew something was up for a while. Looking back, I recall being about five and bursting into tears seemingly out of nowhere. I asked…

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Growing Up With Dissociative Identity Disorder

My name is Kenjō. I’m a high school student with dissociative identity disorder (DID) who has had two alters for around six years. I haven’t been diagnosed yet because I don’t find it relevant or useful enough, but I’m definitely on the spectrum of dissociative identity disorder. A diagnosis hasn’t really been something I’ve tried…

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Living With Schizophrenia

Imagine this, an 18-year-old lad with budding schizophrenia, who, as a gardener, had a closer friendship with soil than with so much of the wild world, and who left the sixties music behind him in the 1990’s because of a love for the music of Russian composers Mussorgsky and Rimsky-Korsakov. This was the complexity of a…

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Reminder: Depression Is REAL

finding happiness

It’s easy to say that someone has “the blues” or they are just “lazy,” letting the world pass them by. It’s easy to look at that person from the outside and think they lay in bed all day because they just don’t want to do anything. They let the dishes pile up because they don’t…

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Navigating Anger And Guilt With A Spinal Meningioma

spinal meningioma

My boyfriend and I first met in college through mutual friends. At the time, I was still living a normal life despite being diagnosed at five years old with an extremely rare tumor called a spinal meningioma. I had already racked up three surgeries but other than a slightly odd walk, I looked like an average college student. A student who maybe sprained her ankle.…

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Being A Caregiver With Fibromyalgia & Depression

domestic violence lgbt

It was easy to hide the pain of fibromyalgia when I worked full time and was constantly on the go. Hide the limp, hide the grimace, fake the smile, and no one knew how badly I physically hurt. These actions also hid how badly I mentally hurt too. The feelings of despair and failure that…

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When Anxiety Turns To Anger

anxiety and anger

I am an anxious person. I am an angry person. Every time I drive I find myself screeching against the windows, pounding the wheel under my white knuckles as I hurl expletives and my eyes bulge out of my head. Somehow, perversely, my anger is fuller when other people are in the car. My fury…

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How Domestic Violence Kept Me From Coming Out

domestic violence lgbt

I remember the first time a pretty girl kissed me. We were both on ecstasy at a rave. She had shiny bleached hair, so over-treated it was silver, and it fell perfectly straight just to her jawline. I thought she looked like a model or a pop star, and I couldn’t believe she wanted to…

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